Helene Bøksle's Voice Returns to Conan
The terror attack on Utøya on July 22, 2011 changed countless lives in Norway. 77 people were killed. For artist Helene Bøksle, it also marked an abrupt and painful shift in her career. Music she had recorded for Age of Conan: Hyborian Adventures (2008) was used in the terrorist’s manifesto, and overnight she felt unable to perform it again. For fifteen years, she waited for the moment when she could reclaim that music—and her voice. Now, she says, that moment has finally arrived. Helene is known for her powerful, expressive vocals, yet she describes the aftermath of 2011 as if her voice had been “taken” from her—emotionally and physically. “I needed time to find the strength to reclaim my voice,” she says. “I know how my voice was when I wasn’t afraid. As a child I would go into the woods to test my voice, hear the reverb, feel the strength—where no one could tell me I was too loud or taking up too much space.” The scars from that summer remain. With glassy eyes, she recalls how her world was turned upside down when she was involuntarily associated with the attacker. “What was so hard for me was that it felt so personal.” Though emotional, her voice is not trembling. The music she recorded for Age of Conan had been written for a vocal register and strength she felt was taken from her during 2011. Performing it became impossible. The soundtrack, beloved by fans worldwide and honored with a Hollywood Music Award, was something she had always hoped to perform live in the years to come. But that opportunity vanished. “I would be lying if I said I wasn’t afraid. I thought about it every day. I feared how the public, survivors, and next of kin might react.” Still, she didn’t want to look back in ten years and regret not trying. “It became more and more clear that I needed to do something about it. This was a door I wanted to open, but the time never felt right—until now. It was now or never.” She compares the feeling to the Norwegian fairytale character who carries “seven winters and seven summers” inside him, ready to burst free. The years, she says, have also brought maturity to her voice. “Becoming a mother has given my voice depth—and perspective. I want to show my children that I dare to do this, without fear. The easy thing would have been to pretend nothing happened.” Reclaiming the music meant throwing herself into the unknown. But what she found there surprised her. “I’ve felt an unbelievably strong joy being part of Knut’s music again. It felt like it once did. It was written for me, so it felt like coming home.” Composer Knut Avenstroup Haugen has been closely involved throughout the three‑year process. They speak almost daily, she says. The four newly re-recorded songs were performed with the Stavanger Symphony Orchestra, something Helene insisted on. She wanted to do it right – properly. “I sold my childhood home to spare no expense. But it felt meaningful and important. This music is part of my voice and my story.” She wanted the recordings to be fully organic—no shortcuts, no compromises. “It might sound strange for music in a video game, but I wanted every instrument to be analogue.” Her father, also a musician, used to worry about the battles she chose to fight, calling her “his coat of arms.” “I kind of like that. I can be that.” After a long journey, she is finally stepping back into a voice that was always hers – stronger, deeper and with a different perspective than before. On May 8, Helene Bøksle will perform the Age of Conan music at NRK’s Store Studio—her first time in fifteen years. The new recordings are also featured in the newly launched Conan Exiles Enhanced. Photo credits: Agnete Brun
The terror attack on Utøya on July 22, 2011 changed countless lives in Norway. 77 people were killed. For artist Helene Bøksle, it also marked an abrupt and painful shift in her career. Music she had recorded for Age of Conan: Hyborian Adventures (2008) was used in the terrorist’s manifesto, and overnight she felt unable to perform it again.
For fifteen years, she waited for the moment when she could reclaim that music—and her voice. Now, she says, that moment has finally arrived.
Helene is known for her powerful, expressive vocals, yet she describes the aftermath of 2011 as if her voice had been “taken” from her—emotionally and physically.
The scars from that summer remain. With glassy eyes, she recalls how her world was turned upside down when she was involuntarily associated with the attacker.
“What was so hard for me was that it felt so personal.”
Though emotional, her voice is not trembling. The music she recorded for Age of Conan had been written for a vocal register and strength she felt was taken from her during 2011. Performing it became impossible.
The soundtrack, beloved by fans worldwide and honored with a Hollywood Music Award, was something she had always hoped to perform live in the years to come. But that opportunity vanished.
“I would be lying if I said I wasn’t afraid. I thought about it every day. I feared how the public, survivors, and next of kin might react.”
Still, she didn’t want to look back in ten years and regret not trying.
“It became more and more clear that I needed to do something about it. This was a door I wanted to open, but the time never felt right—until now. It was now or never.”
She compares the feeling to the Norwegian fairytale character who carries “seven winters and seven summers” inside him, ready to burst free. The years, she says, have also brought maturity to her voice.
Reclaiming the music meant throwing herself into the unknown. But what she found there surprised her.
“I’ve felt an unbelievably strong joy being part of Knut’s music again. It felt like it once did. It was written for me, so it felt like coming home.”
Composer Knut Avenstroup Haugen has been closely involved throughout the three‑year process. They speak almost daily, she says.
The four newly re-recorded songs were performed with the Stavanger Symphony Orchestra, something Helene insisted on. She wanted to do it right – properly.
“I sold my childhood home to spare no expense. But it felt meaningful and important. This music is part of my voice and my story.”
She wanted the recordings to be fully organic—no shortcuts, no compromises.
“It might sound strange for music in a video game, but I wanted every instrument to be analogue.”
Her father, also a musician, used to worry about the battles she chose to fight, calling her “his coat of arms.”
“I kind of like that. I can be that.”
After a long journey, she is finally stepping back into a voice that was always hers – stronger, deeper and with a different perspective than before.
On May 8, Helene Bøksle will perform the Age of Conan music at NRK’s Store Studio—her first time in fifteen years. The new recordings are also featured in the newly launched Conan Exiles Enhanced.
Photo credits: Agnete Brun
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